“The Meg” movie review

They finally got a bigger boat. But, it’s still no match for the Megalodon! Maybe The Meg lacks the cinematic genius of Steven Spielberg’s Jaws and maybe it isn’t as thrilling as The Shallows and perhaps it doesn’t have the parody and satire of Sharknado, but good thing for you, it doesn’t pretend to be any of those. It proudly hits theatres everywhere this weekend as a thrilling larger than life creature feature horror film about a gigantic shark that wreaks havoc in the waters of southeast Asia until Jason Statham dives in to save the day. Another title for this shark movie of epic proportions could be Dive Hard (haha). With clear homages to JawsDeep Blue Sea, and Jurassic Park, this film plays out as an unconventional love letter of sorts to the aforementioned movies, and the man vs nature horror genre as a whole. Even though recent news suggests that Statham is unhappy with the theatrical we are getting (because it lacks much of the violence that was shot in order to keep a PG-13 rating), you are in for a fun time witnessing the aquatic carnage and high seas action. Movies like this one are designed for one purpose, to entertain you at the megaplex for a couple of hours during oppressively hot summer days of August. At the end of the day, The Meg is an exponentially more expensive SyFy Channel original movie with a fantastic lead actor who plays Jason Statham better than anyone else. But you know what, it’s a lot of fun to watch! Dive right on into the action this weekend.

After a deep sea submarine exploring the Mariana Trench is attacked and stranded by an unknown force, the chief researcher at a state-of-the-art underwater facility, bankrolled by an eccentric billionaire, contacts deep sea rescue diver Jonas Taylor (Statham). With time running out for the submarine crew, Jonas must overcome psychological obstacles from his past in order to lead the mission to rescue the team. Unbeknownst to the research team, they’ve encountered an unimaginable threat that makes its way from the deepest depths of the ocean to crowded beaches. The team must work together to stop the monstrous killing machine knows as the megalodon.

Filled with cliches and homages, director Jon Turteltaub clearly did not set out to direct a Jaws for 2018 nor did he set out to make a comedy like Sharknado, but he did create a fantastically fun shark horror movie that takes itself just seriously enough but still remains playful–as much as you can with a man-eating giant pre-historic shark. The scene with the helicopter flying through the islands to the research facility is taken right out of Jurassic Park. And it arrives at an underwater research facility that is taken directly from Deep Blue Sea, and then several shots and musical scores pay homage to Jaws throughout the remainder of the film. For all the tropes and cliches in the film, they are each executed strategically with wit and style. Statham is great as the hero, and I can think of few other actors who could have done such an excellent job with this film. Bruce Willis is honestly the only other name that comes to mind to have done the character justice. Comparing this creature feature horror film to the other big one this summer Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom, I can honestly that I enjoyed The Meg more. And that is hard to admit since I am a card-carrying member of the Jurassic Park fan club.

If you enjoy fun horror films, do yourself a favor and swim to your local cinema to come face-to-face with Megalodon. You may notice that this review is a lot shorter than my typical ones, and that is because some movies are just meant to be enjoyed for what they are instead of analyzing the storytelling and experience.

Checkout my retrospective on JAWS!

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Take Mom to the Parks this Mother’s Day

With Mother’s Day quickly approaching, you may be thinking of something special to do for her that weekend. For those of you who live in Florida, California, Texas, or the many other places where theme and amusement parks are located, then perhaps consider taking her to one of them for a day of magic, thrills, and enjoyment. I have many fond memories of hanging out with my mother in the theme parks, and thought that I would explore some different theme parks and outline some ideas that you may want to use if you decide to whisk your mom away for a day of excitement and adventure. Even before living in Florida, I grew up going to the parks, and some of my favorite memories are experiencing all the attractions with my family. Even when I go today (which is practically weekly), I often remember the ride and show experiences with my mom. As a little side note, the first time I saw Wishes: a Magical Gathering of Dreams fireworks spectacular at Magic Kingdom was when my mom moved me to Orlando. Perhaps your mom enjoys the familiar characters of Disney, maybe she loves the thrill of being chased by dinosaurs at Universal, the aquatic life of SeaWorld, or the intimate animal encounters of Busch Gardens. Whatever your mom likes, there is a plan for you! For those of you who may have lost your mom, my heart goes out to you; but, maybe there remains a mother-figure in your life that could use a special day. Since you may only be able to visit a theme park for one day, the following articles combine attractions or experiences that can easily be accomplished, even on a moderately busy day. Let’s hit the road and see what endearing adventures lie in waiting for you and your mom this Mother’s Day.

As this is a rather lengthy series articles, you can jump to a particular park by clicking on the one you want below, or simply scroll through browsing the headlines.

Universal Orlando

The first stop on our Mother’s Day theme park day is Universal Orlando Resort! You can start your day by grabbing some delicious pastries or breakfast sandwiches at the Beverly Hills Boulangerie, located near the entrance of Universal Studios. Don’t let the pretentious name deter you; this is a quick-service style restaurant that will provide you with a carb-filled fare and coffee to boost your energy. Next, walk along Hollywood Blvd for some star searching; you may run into Marilyn Monroe, Lucille Ball, or Betty Boop. After sightseeing in Hollywood, your help is needed! E.T. must make it home to the Green Planet to save it. Stop by the E.T. Adventure to pickup a bike and take him home. Not all aliens are good guys. Your mom’s skills are needed by the MIB Agency to clean up the city streets and protect earth’s citizens at MIB: Alien Attack. After this close  encounter of the third kind, head back to Hollywood to learn about Universal’s horror film legacy and perhaps some scares along the way at the Horror Makeup Show.

By now, you and your mom are probably getting a little hungry, and there is no better place within the park to grab lunch than The Leaky Cauldron. After leaving the Horror Makeup Show, head directly across the lagoon to walk though the wall into The Wizarding World of Harry Potter’s Diagon Alley. Here, your mom can be immersed in the nostalgia and magic of J.K. Rowling’s Wizarding World. Located near the entrance, on the left, is the famous Leaky Cauldron. You’ll find a better assortment of British favorites at this quick casual dining restaurant. Now that your energy is back up, make your way to Gringotts Bank because you are needed to help Harry and his friends escape capture by him who shall not be named. Climb aboard a mine cart and race through the bank’s underworld to retrieve a horcrux. If you happen to hear the wickedly talented Celestina Warbeck and her banshees performing when you exit Gringotts, don’t miss her jazz concert! After winding your way through Knockturn Alley, head over to Kings Cross Station to climb aboard the Hogwarts Express, destination Hogsmeade (park-hopper ticket required).

Once in Hogsmeade, head for Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry because Harry, Ron, and Hermione require your assistance in defeating some dementors at Forbidden Journey. Before leaving Hogsmeade, be sure to stop by the Butterbeer cart. From flying on park benches to running from dinosaurs, your mom’s next stop should be Jurassic Park! From the time you walk under the iconic gates, become immersed in the epic franchise. Before setting out into the park, stop by the JP Discovery Center located in the replica of the original Visitors Center. There, you can adopt a baby Raptor, learn about genetic sequencing, or pickup some JP merchandise. You can take a memorable picture at the Raptor Encounter, one that the memories will never become extinct. Instead of the Jungle Explorers, hop aboard the river raft for a tour through the prehistoric park. You never know what you’ll encounter on the tour at the River Adventure! Leaving Isla Nublar, you and your mom need to sail over to Skull Island where you will come face to face with the Rein of Kong. Your expedition will take you deep into the heart of Skull Island where bugs are larger than life, giant worm-like creatures exist in the mercy waters, and dinosaurs still roam about. Just don’t forget who’s the king of the jungle.

Following the dark adventures of Skull Island and Jurassic Park, walk through the colorful, fun Toon Lagoon. If you and your mom enjoy water rides, there are two exciting ones right there: Popeye’s Barges and Rip Saw Falls. Rather hang with Spider-Man and The Incredible Hulk? Then stop by Marvel Superhero Island for some web-slinging action at the Spider-Man 4D ride or volunteer to be turned into a Hulk at the exhilarating Incredible Hulk Coaster. Passing the Port of Entry at Islands of Adventure, prepare to be transported to the whimsical world of beloved Dr. Seuss. Here you’ll want to experience the nostalgia of The Cat in the Hat, stop by the Lorax to save the Truffula Trees, or take to the skies on the Seuss Train! By this time, you’re day is nearly over, but you’ve still likely got time for a few more attractions. Your next stop is New York City, but you need to make a stop in London at Kings Cross station. Make your may to the Hogsmeade Station on the other side of the Lost Continent. If you have time, though, you don’t want to miss the immersive spectacle of the special effects walk-through show at Poseidon’s Fury located in the heart of The Lost Continent. If time allows, and you want to grab a bite to eat for dinner, then check out Mythos, the highly rated restaurant, located directly across from Poseidon’s temple.

After the Hogwarts Express stops at Kings Cross, journey to the museum of antiquities, housing the treasures from a recent Egyptian excavation. At Revenge of the Mummy, you and you mom will be faced with a daring escape from Imhotep. Along the way, you’ll encounter treasures beyond your wildest imagination and ancient curses as well. What better way to end the night than to surprise your mom with studio audience tickets to an exclusive Universal Orlando taping of The Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon! No need to hail a cab or take the subway to 30 Rock, just walk a couple blocks from the museum. No conventional queue here, you and your mom will have the freedom to walk about the NBC Studios while waiting for Jimmy Fallon’s studio to open. During your wait, you can enjoy the musical offerings of The Ragtime Gals and even kick back and charge your phone. When Jimmy Fallon challenges you to a race, then you and your mom will Race Through New York in an attempt to beat Fallon for first place! On you way out of the park, you and your mom definitely need to stop by the Universal Studios globe for a photo to remember your world of adventure.

SeaWorld Orlando

Maybe movies just aren’t your mom’s thing. Perhaps she prefers close encounters of another kind. Then head west on the I-4 to SeaWorld Orlando for Mothers Day. With a balanced combination of aquatic animal encounters and some thrilling coasters, SeaWorld Orlando may be just the ticket for mom. Before heading into the park, you may want to grab breakfast outside because the breakfast food selections are rather anemic. Upon entering the park, stop by the giant SeaWorld Anniversary Celebration photo op to start your day out right. Next, want to feel what its like to fly through the waters of the ocean? Then your first stop should be Manta! This inverted coaster will give you the sensation that you are a manta ray smoothly and quickly gliding around the sea. When you exit Manta, spend some time in the aquarium to get up close and personal with hundreds of tropical fish including some stingrays.

After spending time with stingrays, take your mom on down to Key West for some dolphin viewing! For an extra special treat, check out the close encounter times where she can touch a dolphin. On the backside of the dolphin lagoon is the underwear viewing area. Perfect for watching the dolphins frolic in the water; you might even catch one smiling at you. Beyond the dolphin cove lies the Turtle Trek aquarium and 360-degree 3D theatre experience. Become a turtle and journey from your egg to the ocean, back to lay your eggs, and return to the ocean in this suspenseful film. Along the way, you’ll meet some manatees and other oceanlife too. By the time you’ve returned to the surface, it will likely be time to catch the new Dolphin Days show. Watch a trainers give you glimpse into their world of training, educating, and playing with the dolphins–you’ll catch some great tricks too!

Next, Journey to Atlantis in SeaWorld’s water ride that sends you on an adventure to the legendary lost city ending with a plunge into the deep blue sea. If your mom has a slight aversion to wear rides, just make sure you bring ponchos. You’re probably a little hungry at this point, but don’t grab lunch just yet–definitely grab a snack though.  From Atlantis to facing off with a mythological creature, head directly for Kraken. A more traditional coaster, Kraken includes drops loops and cobra rolls. When you’ve defeated the Kraken, head on over to cool off in Antarctica where you can follow a cute little penguin named Puff to meet all his friends and family on a moderately thrilling ride through icy caverns and chilly waters. From cute penguins to cute sea lions, the next part of your Mother’s Day with Mom is visiting with the seals located near Sea Lion and Otter stadium. Be sure not to miss Clyde and Seamore Sea Lion High comedy show.

Finally, time to eat! And you’re not just going to eat anywhere, but you’re going to take mom to Sharks Underwater Grill (make reservations ahead of time). Sharks provides an upscale dining atmosphere complete with Sharkquarium side tables, comprehensive menu including fish, steak, and more. The lobster bisque is incredibly good! Don’t forget to order a signature cocktail to accompany your meal. When you’ve finished dining, swim on down to the walkthrough aquarium. Here, you will be surrounded on three sides by a wide variety of fish and sharks. Upon exiting, you’re in the perfect place to experience SeaWorld’s newest coaster Mako! No inversions here, but the speed, drops, and smooth ride will have you wanting to ride it again. Excellent coaster experience!

With the day coming to a close, you want to head for Shamu Stadium for One Ocean, SeaWorld’s premiere show that is best viewed in the evening. Orcas (or Killer Whales) accompany you on an adventure including beautiful music, breathtaking colors, and outstanding trailed behaviors that highlight the magic of Orcas and even teach you a conservation message. After the show, if you have time, you can checkout the Wild Arctic attraction that puts you right in the middle of the excitement and danger of the the frozen wilderness. On your way out of the park, be sure to stop by the many merchandise shops. A percentage of SeaWorld’s profits go to fund not only theirs, but other conservation organizations and animal rescues around the world.

Walt Disney World

Has your mom ever dreamed of flying on an elephant, cruising through the jungle, or rocketing through space? Then make her “dreams come true” at the Walt Disney World Resort. Wish so much to see and do, it can be overwhelming. If you’re on a budget and can only spend one day–a’chem Mother’s Day–at the world’s premiere theme park destination, then you’ll find everything you need right here to create magical memories for mom this year. But which park? That is a toughie for sure. Each park offers something that the others do not. Hence why many opt for a park-hopper pass (a little pricy). When choosing one park at which to spend the day, then I typically recommend choosing either Magic Kingdom or Epcot. Don’t get me wrong, Animal Kingdom and Hollywood Studios are fun too; in fact, the Twilight Zone Tower of Terror is my favorite ride in the parks. But, my goal is to help you plan out a day that fits time and budget constraints. For purposes of this article, I am going to talk about Magic Kingdom; however, if your mom prefers a more educational experience, enjoys tasting wines, beers, and foods from around the world, and likes some innovative ride experiences, then Epcot would be the best pick. The new Soarin’ is dope!

After making your way to Magic Kingdom (MK) from the Transportation and Ticket Center on either the monorail or ferry, you just have to take a photo with your mother in front of the iconic train station. There is usually a PhotoPass photographer available to take your picture. Before venturing too far, visit a FastPass+ kiosk to make reservations for rides, character experiences, etc. Once on Main Street USA, you may want to visit Mickey and Minnie in Town Square Theatre before setting out into the park. Who doesn’t love waffles??? With a day of adventure ahead, be sure to boost your energy with a stop at Starbucks and the Plaza Ice Cream Parlor. There, you can get Mickey Waffles with strawberries on top! So many shoppes! If your mom likes to browse the latest Disney merchandise, then she will likely find something she’ll love in one of the many shoppes along Main Street. Of course, it’s Mother’s Day, so be sure to buy her something. In order to make the most of your time, I do not suggest stopping at the shoppes until you are leaving the park. Before you go any further, you and your mom have to take pictures in front of one of the most recognizable castles in the world! So many wonderful locations from which to take pictures with Cinderella’s Castle in the background. From the castle hub, you can head anywhere!

I suggest first heading to Fantasyland to catch a ride on the Seven Dwarfs Mine Train! Ordinarily, I like going in a circle in the parks, but this ride tends to have a very long line, and if you don’t have a FastPass+ reservation for it, then you want to hit it first. Here are a couple fun tips: (1) when in the standby queue, if you can get all the barrels of jewels spinning at the same time, then you might just catch a glimpse of Snow White dancing on the ceiling! (2) once on board the mine train, try to rock your cart left and right–so much fun! Following your visit with Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, then head on over to Storybook Circus where you can take flight on the world’s most famous flying elephant. After Dumbo returns you safely to the ground, you’re going to continue your magical journey under the sea in Fantasyland with Ariel! Climb inside a clamshell and relive the magic of the movie that radically shifted Disney animated films. For a little pick me up, check out Gaston’s Tavern where you can get Disney’s answer to Butterbeer, Lafou’s Brew. If time allows, head next door to enjoy some Storytime with Belle and become part of the enchanting tale of Beauty and the Beast.

Walking around the back of the castle and to the right, you’ll want to choose between It’s a Small World After All or Peter Pan’s Flight. Both are so iconic that it is hard to choose, but I’m trying to get you through MK in one day. You’re probably glancing at your watch and wondering when lunchtime is, I suggest stopping by the Columbia Harbor House or Liberty Tree Tavern, both located near one another. Located in that same area of Liberty Square is The Haunted Mansion. They have 999 happy haunts, but there’s room for a thousand, any volunteers??? When nearing the exit of Mansion, be aware of hitchhiking ghosts, they might just follow you home. As you round the lagoon, you’ll make your way to Frontierland! This exciting wild west town is home to two iconic mountains: Big Thunder Mountain and Splash Mountain. Won’t likely be time for both, so I suggest Thunder Mountain! From the wild west to jungles and pirate infested waters, you’re heading for Adventureland! Climb aboard if you dare, the Pirates of the Caribbean. Who knows? You might just spy the infamous Captain Jack Sparrow. If you make it out unscathed, then sail for the world famous Jungle Cruise! After cruising down so many of the most famous rivers on the planet, you are definitely in need of some dinner. Thankfully, there is a great place to grab some great food at the Skippers Canteen (I suggest reservations).

No Mother’s Day trip to Disney World would be complete without a visit to Tomorrowland! Skip across the hub to where there is always “a great big beautiful tomorrow shining at the end of everyday.” Located in the back of Tomorrowland is Space Mountain! Prepare to rocket through space on this classic Disney coaster. Before heading back to the hub to catch the new Happily Ever After nighttime firework spectacular, you need to stop by the longest running stage show in the history of American theatre Carousel of Progress! Here you will witness the history of the American family and technology from the early 1900s to “present day” (1990s). I seldom miss experiencing Carousel on my many trips to the park. After the beautiful firework display over the castle, now’ time to hit the shoppes on Main Street! There is something for everyone, especially mom! Sometimes it’s the little things that mean the most such as time spend with your mother, but never under estimate how much she’ll appreciate a souvenir from Mickey’s Emporium or Uptown Jewelers. I enjoy taking the ferry back to parking at night because of the cooler night air and breeze.

Busch Gardens Tampa

Feel the wilds of Africa calling your name? Does you mom like getting up close with lions, tigers, and kangaroos??? Then, take her to Busch Gardens Tampa Bay for Mother’s Day! Only an hour away from Disney World, Busch Gardens Tampa boasts a fantastic assortment of intimate animal encounters and thrilling coasters. For an extra special treat, book a seat on the Serengeti Safari to feed giraffes. With many shows, rides, and animal encounters to choose from, a day at Busch Gardens will make for a memorable Mother’s Day. Due to limited breakfast options in the park, I suggest grabbing bite to eat at First Watch near USF to boost your energy! After entering the park, head for Adventure Photo to take a picture of you and your mom that can help you remember your adventure-filled day through Africa, Australia, and more. If you need an extra boost of caffein, then there is  a Starbucks located near the entrance of the park. Heading to the right, you’ll pass the Moroccan Palace, home of the Iceploration Show–come back later as you don’t want to miss it! The entrance of the first animal habitat you want to his is near the palace. Get ready to encounter gorillas in the Myombe Reserve. Meandering through the lush forests and exploring caverns, you’ll have the opportunity to get some rare glimpses of gorillas and other African animals.

Upon exiting the Myombe Reserve, head to the right to head back toward the Morocco area in order to make your way to Egypt! Egypt is home to three of Busch Gardens’ best coasters: Cheetah Hunt, Cobra’s Curse, and (my personal favorite) Montu. Each coaster offers a very different ride experience. On your way to Cheetah Hunt, you’ll get the opportunity to meet some cheetahs. Cheetah Hunt is a high speed more traditional coaster that gives you the feeling of being a cheetah racing through the Savana. After sprinting through the wild African plains, you’ll want to check out one of nature’s most mysterious and terrifying creatures the King Cobra. Hope in a spinning mine cart at Cobra’s Curse and ride the elevator to the top to come face to face with the King of Cobras himself. This entry level coaster is fun for the whole family, especially if you can get everyone spinning the cart. Oh yeah, it has an indoor queue too! Just up the hill from Cobra on of my favorite coasters period–Montu! A lengthy gravity defying inverted coaster, Montu constantly ranks as a top coaster from blogs and enthusiasts. Returning from your Egyptian exclusion, make your way to the Edge of Africa animal walkabout. There, you’ll have excellent views of the Serengeti and lots of photo opportunities. Along the way, you’ll see lions, giraffes, ostriches, hyenas, zebra, and more! You’ll feel as if you are right there with the animals. If you’re lucky, then you’ll find the lions right up next to the viewing area.

For an even closer experience, you can climb aboard the Serengeti Express for a steam train ride around the animal preserve! When you return to the Nairobi train station, you can head back toward the Moroccan Palace for Iceploration! This ice skating show is a treasure! Simply beautiful, and some humor as well. After backtracking a little to the ice palace, head back to the Cheetah Hunt area to dine at the Serengeti Overlook Restaurant. This 19th century themed restaurant, offers great views of the Serengeti and two dining options: table service and quick service. Once you’ve replenished your energy, take a stroll along the wooded path beyond the railroad tracks, and you’ll meander past the hippo and Nile crocodile viewing areas. Eventually the path will lead back to the Nairobi area. Take a right and head to see the elephants and onward to Pantopia! Pantopia is home to Falcon’s Fury, the midway area, Opening Night Critters show and a few other attractions. Depending on what your mom is most interested in, you can decide how to best use your time; but I recommend soaring through the sky like a falcon and watching the show. I find the scariest part of Falcon’s Fury is rising up and the comedy in the Opening Night Critters show is adorable!

Over the ridge from Pantopia lies the Congo! By now, you and your mom are probably roasting in the hot humid Florida weather and desire a fun way to cool off. Consider river rafting at Congo River Rapids! You’re liable to get soaking wet on this thrilling adventure through this mysterious river region of Africa. Deep in the jungles of Africa lie some mysterious creatures, but thankfully Busch Gardens has a journey to send you on to face off with Kumba! If you and you mom love looping coasters, then you’ll definitely enjoy Kumba. While waiting for the coaster, you’ll get to hear the roar of Kumba as it races by. Next door to Congo is Junglala, home the Bengal Tigers! Jungala offers a fabulous Bengal Tiger animal habitat with lot of different views. As you make your way through the jungle, you’ll find yourself in Stanleyville surrounded by great food options, a log flume, and you’ll encounter Sheikra! Complete with a freefall and inversions, this coaster is incredibly exciting. You’ll probably only have time for either the coaster or log flume.

With all the best rides out of the way, you and mom are probably ready to cool off and calm down. If you’re interested in feeding colorful birds in a large aviary, you and your mom will enjoy Lory Landing. You’ll need to walk through the Sesame Street area in order to get to your next destination: Australia! Best part of Australia is the Walkabout Way, home of kangaroos, wallabies, and other animals native to Australia. Finish off the day with a stroll past the flamingos and then you’re back where you began near Morocco. Stop by Adventure Photo to get photos printed to visually capture your memories from your trek across Africa, Australia, and beyond!

I hope I’ve been able to give you some exciting ideas of how to spend this Mother’s Day in the theme parks with your mom. There are so many other activities and experiences that I could not include; but I hope that I’ve been able to layout some solid ideas of how to make the most of your day in the parks with your mother. In addition to the regularly operating attractions, there are special brunches and uncharges on Mother’s Day that you may want to take advantage of. However, if you’re trying to do a theme park on a dime, then what I’ve laid out for you should fit the bill nicely! It’s not the money you spend on mom, but the TIME spent with her. THAT is what she will remember most.

And to my mom, Happy Mother’s Day! Thank you for the memories. I love you!